now you are four

we squeezed every last moment out of three. so much change came to you this year. a new house, new preschool, new sister, new words, new movement. it's hard to remember that you are still so very little when i see you next to your baby sister. but you are.

you still only want to wear tights, dresses, long sleeves, and tutus. no pockets. only dresses with a waist ("like the foxy one mama.") you love watching all of the old christmas specials with me and know the words to so many of my favorite christmas songs. when your little sister cries you say "shhh, it's alright. elodie is right here."

some things you are saying:

"i don't like pockets. they're not awesome. they're not pretty."

"oh by holly have a golly jolly Christmas this year."

"standing up is hard right?"

"my lipglost has sparkles on it. it's magic. it's gonna make your lips feel so much better."

"do you know when my favorite week is? valentimes."

"first you are a baby, then you are a kid, then you grow up, then you are a teacher. right poppa?"

"if you are thirsty, you can realize there is soda water, right mama?"

we spent the day together visiting santa and having a little tea party. it was a bitterly cold day by LA standards and when we finally got home to our cozy house, we were tired and you curled up next to me on the couch, looking at the christmas tree. after dinner, we lit candles and i made a wish that i could watch you grow in peace. that you could be little, free from worry, which is what every parent wishes for their children but i wished it especially hard today.